Thanks to the lovely Leo Babauta from Zen Habits I've been inspired to write my own 10 lessons that I've learnt in the past decade :)
1) It's a short ride.
On the 10th of October 2012 I found out my Grandma had Leukaemia on the 13th of December she passed away and in between I became her carer. On April 17th 2019 my Dad passed away suddenly in his sleep. This past decade I lost two of the most important people in my life. I truly wish with all my heart they were still physically around me. They are not and the lesson here is that one day you won't be either. I don't think it's healthy to contemplate mortality constantly but it's nice to remind yourself to make the most of what is left.
2) Growth is Super Crazy Important.
In 2010 I met the love of my life, Ben. The major strength in our relationship (besides a whole lot of other good stuff like friendships and affection, support and silliness) is our joint desire for growth, both individually and together. Ben has taught me to communicate a whole lot more effectively. I've learnt to be less passive aggressive and more clear and that speaking up won't negate my kindness.
3) Compassion for others will (almost selfishly) make you feel better about yourself.
In 2015 when my cat killed a bird and then that night I ate chicken and contemplated the hypocrisy of being upset at my cat, I've been travelling down a more committed path of compassion. The Minimalists (Josh and Ryan) talk about leading a life where your short term actions meet your long term values. I like to think I've always had compassion for others and animals but my actions really didn't align until I became vegan.
4) Love is the answer.
Everyone keeps saying it but it's a cliché because it's true. 2013 was the first time I'd ever held a kitten and the year I started my blog “I used to be scared of cats”. Ben slowly broke down my fear of cats by slowly showing me how to interact with them and how loving they could be and in 2014 we adopted our first cat Gremlin. If I hadn't opened my heart I would have missed out on having the daily love of our two cats. Showing love to another will (with the right boundaries in place) always be beneficial.
5) Filling your life with things you love will make you love your life.
Brewing kombucha, learning how to bleach my hair, slack-lining, making a veggie garden, yoga, film photography, library visits, gratitude journal, growing flowers, learning chainsaw for woodwork, growing mushrooms, going on yearly Fraser camping trips, learning to mosaic, weaving baskets, saving orchids from development lots, discovering new swimming holes. Whatever weird thing you love, fill your life with it now!
6) Things don't always go to plan but you can't let that ruin your now.
In 2015 I got my implanon out to conceive a baby and I'm still not pregnant and that is okay. It was the decade I learnt I had endometriosis and that's okay. I broke my fibula pretending to fly for a photo (proof above!) and that's okay. If you're still here then all you need is gratitude for that.
7) Travel equals Inspiration.
Stumbling upon the hungry ghost festival in Singapore or visiting an abandoned theme park in japan, travel throws rich inspiration at your soul and you never know where that will eventually take you. Travel can also be expensive so no need to get lost in fomo, just travel closer to home :)
8) Death isn't scary - spirituality will let you see the bigger picture.
In 2016 we were driving in a camper van in the snow without snow tyres and I honestly thought we were going to die and I was okay. In the last few years, viewing myself as a soul has changed a lot inside of me. I can't properly articulate it all (or any of it) but I have a strong belief that we're grander then our physical bodies and we have a purpose here to fulfil.
9) You're in charge.
When I turned 30 in 2014 I created an epic prom party for myself. I realised any time you sulk about something in your life, there's action you can do to reverse it. Triggers for me are birthdays and New Years so I plan things on these days. You're in charge!
10) You can do anything, it's just your thoughts that limit you.
Learning probate, buying a house, jumping into water from my year of fear project. To be honest, this is a relatively new lesson for me but I look forward to where it leads me, in this new decade ahead.
1) It's a short ride.
On the 10th of October 2012 I found out my Grandma had Leukaemia on the 13th of December she passed away and in between I became her carer. On April 17th 2019 my Dad passed away suddenly in his sleep. This past decade I lost two of the most important people in my life. I truly wish with all my heart they were still physically around me. They are not and the lesson here is that one day you won't be either. I don't think it's healthy to contemplate mortality constantly but it's nice to remind yourself to make the most of what is left.
2) Growth is Super Crazy Important.
In 2010 I met the love of my life, Ben. The major strength in our relationship (besides a whole lot of other good stuff like friendships and affection, support and silliness) is our joint desire for growth, both individually and together. Ben has taught me to communicate a whole lot more effectively. I've learnt to be less passive aggressive and more clear and that speaking up won't negate my kindness.
3) Compassion for others will (almost selfishly) make you feel better about yourself.
In 2015 when my cat killed a bird and then that night I ate chicken and contemplated the hypocrisy of being upset at my cat, I've been travelling down a more committed path of compassion. The Minimalists (Josh and Ryan) talk about leading a life where your short term actions meet your long term values. I like to think I've always had compassion for others and animals but my actions really didn't align until I became vegan.
4) Love is the answer.
Everyone keeps saying it but it's a cliché because it's true. 2013 was the first time I'd ever held a kitten and the year I started my blog “I used to be scared of cats”. Ben slowly broke down my fear of cats by slowly showing me how to interact with them and how loving they could be and in 2014 we adopted our first cat Gremlin. If I hadn't opened my heart I would have missed out on having the daily love of our two cats. Showing love to another will (with the right boundaries in place) always be beneficial.
5) Filling your life with things you love will make you love your life.
Brewing kombucha, learning how to bleach my hair, slack-lining, making a veggie garden, yoga, film photography, library visits, gratitude journal, growing flowers, learning chainsaw for woodwork, growing mushrooms, going on yearly Fraser camping trips, learning to mosaic, weaving baskets, saving orchids from development lots, discovering new swimming holes. Whatever weird thing you love, fill your life with it now!
6) Things don't always go to plan but you can't let that ruin your now.
In 2015 I got my implanon out to conceive a baby and I'm still not pregnant and that is okay. It was the decade I learnt I had endometriosis and that's okay. I broke my fibula pretending to fly for a photo (proof above!) and that's okay. If you're still here then all you need is gratitude for that.
7) Travel equals Inspiration.
Stumbling upon the hungry ghost festival in Singapore or visiting an abandoned theme park in japan, travel throws rich inspiration at your soul and you never know where that will eventually take you. Travel can also be expensive so no need to get lost in fomo, just travel closer to home :)
8) Death isn't scary - spirituality will let you see the bigger picture.
In 2016 we were driving in a camper van in the snow without snow tyres and I honestly thought we were going to die and I was okay. In the last few years, viewing myself as a soul has changed a lot inside of me. I can't properly articulate it all (or any of it) but I have a strong belief that we're grander then our physical bodies and we have a purpose here to fulfil.
9) You're in charge.
When I turned 30 in 2014 I created an epic prom party for myself. I realised any time you sulk about something in your life, there's action you can do to reverse it. Triggers for me are birthdays and New Years so I plan things on these days. You're in charge!
10) You can do anything, it's just your thoughts that limit you.
Learning probate, buying a house, jumping into water from my year of fear project. To be honest, this is a relatively new lesson for me but I look forward to where it leads me, in this new decade ahead.
Any lesson spring to mind for you? Please share away :)
I have enjoyed your journey. Your writing is beautiful. You are enough.
ReplyDeleteThank-you that's super sweet :)
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